The wind in my hair

You're like the wind in my hair
I long for you and let my hair down
And you sweep on by
First so shy,
And then like a storm
And I close my eyes as you caress my face
And you pass by and travel beyond.

I'm left alone again
Waiting for your return
And what have you left behind for me?
A hand full of knots and bare trees
And just when I'm tired of breaking through these tangles
I tire and tie my hair back up
Promising myself to take care
But there you come again this time faster, and with so much of life.

And my eyes close once again 

And without my doing my hands stretch out 

And you could blow me away if you wanted to 

But right now you make me feel like flying
And I can hear you whisper in the wind, "let go"
And I'm fighting the urge to
Because I keep letting go and all you do is leave me 

with more knots to entangle.
"Let go" you whisper, again
"Why should I", I'm tearing up now
"Because I love you and I won't ever let you go"
Feeble and hungry. 

For love and certainty, I let myself go, 

now lifted by the wind, a part of this force.

I'm unstoppable, I'm fearful, I'm above the dread of the earth
And out of nowhere I can feel it creep through
After ages, this one's for you, I smile.
But I know this will only last a while.
And my distrust in you brings me down
And now I'm back to the ground.
Now as you go on your way,
I'm left again tangled and astray
And yet I turn around to see, wondering when you will come back to me
Cause no matter the mess you make of me
'The wind in my hair' you will always be.

One more night

One more night
I wait
And the moon shines on just like it did yesterday.
But not like it did some days ago.
One more night, I wait
Hopefully, quietly
For you
Don't care much for me.
But one more night won't even be relevant.
Especially if I've waited a lifetime.
But for one more night and counting
There's fear and there are thoughts taunting
And it's haunting
To think what one more night can do
Not just to me and you
But to equation of love around the world
One more night and one more love
Received, given or not accounted for at all.
One more night
And I don't care
Much for the pain.
But this I can't let go in vain.
In one night alot can leave, but one more night and I'm not sure if I will breathe
Life into love or love into life.
What's got me enduring this strife!
You must have done something right
And we can't just give up because of one
Fight
Please, just give it
One more night.

Surfacing Demons

You bring out a part of me I never knew existed.
You bring out the demons and
damn! I feel like I missed it!
This angel has been good too long...
And the good in me is extinguishing fast.
The reason to be good is now long gone,
And I'm hoping the bad in me surfaces fast.

Demons, I wish you knew,
How long I've been waiting for you.
This good girls out the door
To be seen no more.
Find her wherever you may!
But I hope she doesn't see the light of day.
For now rules a woman scorned, she's captured this body.
And possesses this soul!

And how you wish you knew her before!
How you wish you knew the good in her.
For if this is her bad
Just imagine, just imagine how passionate her good was!
Just imagine what you've missed
Just imagine what she could have made you feel with just one kiss...

That killing thing

I give you the rifle, packed with bullets
And I stand across from you as a target
Oh the thrill of knowing you'd never shoot.
I give you a knife and I hold you tight
The joy I find in knowing you'd never stab.
I've given you a dose of poison
And I pass you my drink
What serenity to sip out of it and quench more than my thirst
I'm quenching my ego, I'm feeding my pride
I give you the weapons, I give you the power
And you're making a decision every hour.
There's only one person who will be hurt by the end of this.
And no amount of morphine will numb it.
I'm crazy, I'm losing it, I'm giving it up
All to you, do what you have to.

Lukewarm

I can only take so much of something lukewarm.
There's hot and there's cold and I can take both of them in my stride,
But one at a time.
But lukewarm is weak.
You're too afraid of getting burned,
You're to afraid to freeze,
Lukewarm cannot be me...
I can't stand in the center when I know which side I wanna be on.
And when I don't, I'll choose one anyway,
I'll risk it, for me.
But now you're hot and you're cold and you've pushed me into lukewarm territories.
And I wish I knew where to go.
I could probably walk out the door.
But more than I already am, it will throw me deeper into the floor.
I've done this before.
"Never again" did I say.
But life never listens. He's put me in the same spot.
Wishing my insecurities were never caught.
Wishing my hands never touched cold or hot
For now one hand's frozen and the other not.
One hand's burnt and I wish I had fought.
And in the middle of my heart, I'm lukewarm.
And I need one side to pull me over.
Because lukewarm makes me weak.
And hot or cold, there's only you I really seek.
So pull me a side and stay with me there
Because that's all I dream of, but this is a nightmare.
Babe, I'm almost gone, if you don't take my hand.
I'll lose you and I'll lose me and the world will never understand.

Home

She said she couldn't find it, this place called home.
She never felt it, she never lived in it.
She searched near and far, she tried,
She cried.
Home was always too far away no matter how much she walked.
Home was as good as nowhere now.
Her search ceased when at last she grew tired.
And as she sat herself down on a bed that never gave warmth.
Tears rolled down her cheek.
Would she ever find home?
But there under the covers of her bed,
She allowed her mind to travel,
To go places she otherwise couldn't reach.
Under the sheets, she closed her eyes and dreamed.
Of a man that would one day hold her,
Of a man who would love her,
Who would take her home every night.
Who would hold her till the morning light.
Home would always be right
there.
Keeping her safe, keeping her warm.
Within her he would calm the storm.
And that was home, she knew for sure.
But where was he?
Her search still endures.

Coming Clean

I'm laying it down, I'm coming clean,
I'm giving you my all, my everything I mean.
These walls I'm breaking, no more faking
These secrets are no more, I'm laying them on the floor.
Take me, take my words, take my heart,
Take me and break me apart.
Find my joys and find my sorrows,
And embrace them like there's no tomorrow.
I'm yours for all you want of me,
I'm yours for all you see of me
and more.
Babe, don't turn around and walk out the door.
It took me too long to see you there,
Waiting for me, your love to share.
It took me too long to know that I
Was empty and cold and I couldn't try
To leave my state of despair,
Didn't think for once that I was capable of repair,
That you could come along and make me strong.
That you could break me and take all my right from wrong.
That you would care, I didn't have a clue
But babe, how I love you!
How I want you to love me too,
I'm willing, I'm ready,
Now that your here, don't ever leave.