The Universe v/s Her (Part 2)

But learning doesn't mean accepting.

She can be stubborn when it comes to the people she holds dear to her heart. She doesn't care much for everything and everyone in the past. Right now, you're in her life. And she can't bear the thought of you being any less to her in the future than you are right now. She can't have you not matter to her in the future like the others, you must matter just as much as you do now. And day in and day out, she knows she's trying to fight the universe that's trying to make the inevitable happen. She's fighting it because she needs to prove to herself, to you, to the people gone by that she can decide who stays and that she can keep them.

And she may have failed in the past, but not this time. This battle is between her and the universe, to keep you. And she let it have its way for 20 years but not this time. This time she's taking a stand.

You're too precious, you're too important to her and the universe can try as much as it can but it cannot be greater than her choice of weaponry;
Love

Love triumphs over it all, over time, distance, fear, knowledge, space, oblivion. Love cannot be defeated. At least not with how strongly she feels for you. She can fight the world's deadliest offence and she will keep you with her.

Love may have failed her before, but not this time, this time, it's more powerful than you think. This time it is backed by desire and need, and want more than anything.

You won't be taken away from her the way the others were. You will be her constant and she will love you that way, constantly. 

She has never wanted anyone to stay this much, She has never wanted anyone to be a part of her life this much, but suddenly she does and the universe may question it, you may question it but she is so sure of it. 

And when she's this sure of anything she can do what it takes. She will love with all it takes to keep you!

The Universe v/s Her (Part 1)

She has learned, in the 20 years of her life, that people eventually leave. And by that term she doesn't really mean that they go away from her life but rather that they just don't mean as much as they once did.

If you're as old as her or maybe older you will know by now that the people you once spent hours talking to at a stretch can't hold a 2 minute conversation with you anymore. People you longed to see everyday are a distant memory. People you cried with and laughed with are not the same people anymore or maybe they are but not as much.

She has learned that life goes on and that there are only lessons and memories you can take forward, that people get left behind someway or the other and that you gotta learn to live with that.

She has learned that it hurts and that it won't matter to both of you in the same measure as it does to one. That distance can be a bitch and so can time. That she will meet new people and she will hope she never has to say goodbye but then she will anyway, and she will meet new people who have so much more to give her in this life.

She has learned that she cannot stop people from leaving. She can try all she wants and she can fool herself into believing that she can make them stay. But really, they left long before she realized it. The people who have to leave, will, eventually.

She has learned all these things....

More and more and more

I wish I could tell you
With all my heart
In more than words
How much I love you
If only you saw everything
I wrote between the lines
If only you heard
what I had to say
Between the silence
If only 'I love You'
Was made up of more words.
I wish there was a way
To show you
How you brighten up.
My everyday
You are.
You are more
Than you think.
You are
More.
Than ever before,
I love you
more.
But you don't
know,
Do you?
No.
And you won't
show me
How much you love me
Cause baby, maybe,
I don't deserve you
and I may not be enough
To love
You.
The way I do,
more and
more and
more.
I love you.

Confined

Some days, you wake up and you really wonder what you're here for.
Sometimes, you wanna know where you're headed and why the path doesn't seem so clear,
You wanna know what you're made of;
Stone and cement or ribbons and flowers.
You wanna know what makes you who you are and what brought you to this place.
Sometimes, you want to be greater.
Sometimes, you wish you were less.
Sometimes you just wana go to sleep.
But then again there's so much you wanna achieve.
Some days you'd rather not speak and you wish you could be invisible.
Some days you want to be the center of attention and you want to be loved.
Some days you just don't wanna be the person you were yesterday.
You wonder what's its like to be in a different skin and you take your time to get comfortable in your own.
Sometimes you wish you could escape the universe and sometimes you wish it just rushed into you.
Some days you wish wishes came true,
And that shooting stars would land.
For you've wished upon too many.
And then after these moments of thoughts,
You get off your bed and sit there in silence.
And you wonder if these walls will ever answer you.
The walls you built, yourself.

Chasing sunsets

I'm constantly chasing sunsets
Hoping ever to catch up
To move with the time of day
But I'm always four steps away

I'm constantly chasing sunsets
Rushing with the tide
But right before I reach
I find a secret place to hide

I'm constantly fearing sunsets
The end of every day
So much to do so much to be
I wish there was a way

To catch the sight of the sunset
With no remorse or regrets
But all of the day's lag
to lose and to forget.

Let me find you in the sunset
When the sky turns every shade
And as my day draws to a close
I can hold your hand unafraid

But I'm still chasing sunsets
And still hiding from the light
And darkness holds me
Come the lonely night.

I'll always be chasing sunsets
Until you come along
With you I know I'll make it
With you I can be strong.

I hope I reach the sunset
Then, when you finally reach me.
Until then I'll keep running
Hoping the sunset will find me.

Sleep soundly

Sleep soundly darling, sleep sound
I know what a struggle it can be
When many a times you get so lost
That you forget what is a real dream
The tiredness comes with the struggle
To overcome the force that holds you
That won't let you sleep.
But darling, keep fighting
The unrest will come and go
It will come and go again.
It will hold you and won't let you move
It will strangle you till you aren't sure you're gonna make it.
And then you just take it.
And quiety it leaves.
And you can feel again and mostly you can see again.
They don't know what it feels like to be awake and asleep at the same time.
To have the potential to be and yet not to.
To want to resist death's tease and yet have to bear it with only hope.
But fight it till you have fight in you no more
Don't let it take you over so easily.
This demon of a hold can only scare you
But to kill you it will never be that bold.
For you are stronger than what holds you even though you sometimes feel weak.
And for every time you escape death's illusionary sting,
You've won yourself another go at living.

Sleep soundly, darling, sleep sound.

Some nights

Some nights are a struggle,
Sleep calls but your body won't listen,
Some nights you grow restless,
And peace can be found but you don't want to search.
Some nights, you need that unrest,
Those sleepless moments
They let you feel what you otherwise sleep off.
And there's pain rushing through your soul
Because it is awake at the hour of truth,
When mind body and soul sync in time
And when each must confess to one another.
Where masks are taken off and walls are brought down,
And three become one.
And yet you feel like you've been shattered into a million pieces.
The night grows colder and the one thing that can keep you warm seems too far away;
Almost kept away,
Just so that you have this moment of settlement,
This intervention,
this state of feeling everything that you tried your best not to.
Some nights are not like every other night.
Some nights just break you.
So that the dawn can re-make you.

Settle

Take that moment,
Quieten up.
Now lose yourself
In that chaos.