An Unexpected Exception

You may say he was the only exception....
But i would say hes the kind of exception that i never expected
Never in my imagination did i think i would find him...
Hes just what i thought could never exist
Its like the universe was teasing me when he came around...
My heart pounded in his presence
The sight of him could have my knees grow weak
He had my fingers freeze until i couldn't feel them anymore
By just being around me, he had my un-didvided attention, no matter where i was...
No one else could make me fell the way he did
No other made me want to impress...
I would never have given myself a chance to fall for someone,
To fall so hard in love.... and it wouldn't be the same if it were someone else...
All in all, i couldn't help but wonder.. Why Now??? Why ever???
Maybe he is everything I've been waiting for, but now am I done waiting???

It didn't take long for him to find an exception of a girl for himself
And although you and i would want that girl to be me, sadly, it wasn't.
And never once in all my thoughts did i question: is the universe done teasing me???
What if he wasn't here to find me? what if we weren't meant to be?
My mind, occupied with its thoughts and fears failed to see how he was being taken away from me.
Not that i ever had a claim over him....
Not that i was assured that he existed because  i thought we were destined to be together.

The heart is weak,
It finds something that keeps it happy and then grows so attached to it.
The heart embraces this special something/someone in a tight grip, never wanting to let go...
But the heart, foolish as it sometimes is, surely is capable of embracing illusions.
It sees what it desires to see, what it longs for the most...
And when reality decides to make its appearance...the embrace is left empty and purposeless...
Almost like a disappearing act, what it held on to so tightly turned out to be just an illusion...
And the illusion was nothing but hopes dreams and desires.

Give up or Hang on

She stayed so long! she stayed through it all.
Like a rock in a river, she let it all pass by her.
She fought like a mother saving her child.
She fought because she knew it was just another mile.

She held on to what she had, though little it was.
She gave life all that she could,
But life did throw at her more than what it should....

For every time she felt like giving up,
There was always another voice asking her to hang on, to stay.
Soon, the times she felt like giving up... increased....
But she ignored it and stayed...she chose which voice to listen too...

In a year or two, fighting tired her out...
was life meant to be about fighting your way through or living your way through?
the voices grew louder....
and decision making soon was not done by the mind but by the body...

The body grew weak, tired of what could have been done differently...
Hope and faith seemed to be moving away slowly...
And even though a fighter still tried to fight....
soon it wasn't her battle anymore.

Now it was the voices...
One louder than the other...
Give up...Hang on....
She finally gave in to both.

Care to Care?

Just because they don't talk....does not mean they don't care. They do.
Sometimes care is difficult to notice...
Especially if its from someone who has been giving it to you for quite some time.
What is care? Is it Worry? Is it concern? Is it acknowledgement?
Care is much more than all of these put together.
Its almost a matter of belonging, acceptance and mostly GIVING.
Care should never go unnoticed....
One cares... not for credit but for the joy in giving joy.
One cares when one Loves.Care cannot exist without Love.
So if someone cares so much to make sure that you are at your happiest moments always...
Know that there is love that's driving him. Because to care is to love.
And yes, maybe you may not reciprocate the same feelings...
But that's not an excuse for you to take someones care for you for granted.
We all may not have care givers to call our own... mostly because we are to blind to notice them.
But they exist...secretly...watching over us..... whether you appreciate them or not
But if we Care enough to inspire others to care...
A lot can happen with some simple words and deeds.
And i'm talking about a revolution...

Those Eyes...

You're eyes are more expressive than you think they are...
They betray you most of the time as you try to fool the world.
But they befriended me when my eyes met yours for the first time.
Its funny you don't know...how i trust your eyes more than i trust you.
Cause they will never lie to me or ever hide anything from me.

No, I'm not accusing you of anything.
Your eyes, expressive as they are, give to the world more of you than you do yourself.
And in them , its not difficult to see what your heart leaps for, what your soul cries for,
and what your being really lives for ....
Its no difficult task to see your emotions.... Its out there, displayed.
Your eyes betray you again and again....

But, hidden beneath those sparkling instruments of sight, is something that no one else can see.
Something that only you, you and your inner being have full control over.
Its You.
The world will look into your eyes and see you.
They will see emotions, expressions and a whole lot of things and they will judge, they will criticize.
But what they don't see...is the YOU behind those emotions..... the being behind those eyes.
Those eyes that lie....those eyes that fool... those eyes that betray.... mostly with intentions of doing no harm.

So you lied...

So you lied....
Congratulations.... you have succeeded in making true something that isnt.
Magic? or plain Non-acceptance???
They say the truth is hard to hear.... but maybe its the false that much easier to tell.

So you lied again....
Congratulations... you have done what all cowards do!
Yup! you are no different from the ones who lied to you!
Karma knows how to come knocking back on your door!

So you lied still another time....
Congratulations... its a big deal...
To get away with it...with something wrong...
Cause its easier that way right? much better than facing reality!

You just dont seem to learn your lesson, do you???
Congratulation....You have won a 100 more reasons to lie...
So its all gain??? Yipee!
So much easier than truth's pain!

Do You know what you are now???....
Congratulations.... Life has now turned you into a living one.
A LIVING LIE! so you have a title now!
All because you lied.

They aren't just words anymore...

One of the most beautiful sights, i believe, is a mother teaching her kid to pray.
Walked passed a Little boy and his mother and overheard them talking.
At first i didn't understand what they were saying because they spoke in an unfamiliar language.
And everything that the mother said, the boy repeated after her.
i realized she was teaching him the words of a prayer when i heard the name of their God.

At such tender ages we were taught to pray,
at that point..they were just words... words that we had to say everyday.
And we didn't know what we were saying most of the time.
Until we grew a little older, when we could understand words.
when every word meant something.

Soon every word of a prayer learnt by heart began to mean much more.
And what it meant had no barriers.
Different points of view, different meanings to every word that was said in a prayer.
At this age, prayer grew to be more than just a chanting of words.
There was a desire to understand and a longing to know.

Prayer now has turned into a living.
Every step of the way, every decision we take, we pray.
Sometimes consciously, sometimes very unconsciously!
Now we pray from the heart, now we form our own sentences, frame our own prayers at times.
No longer do we repeat, or chant, now we PRAY.
Because now it means so much more than it did then.
Now we feel the Power of prayer, now there's Faith, now there's Experience...
and not just words...

Stay Afloat

You get a sinking feeling when your neck-deep in water
That final breath you take before it pulls you in
before you give up on staying afloat...
That final thought that crosses your mind,
That decision you make to allow it to swallow you...
Not because you have no hope left
but also because all strength swam away when you couldn't see the shore...
if you choose to let fate decide what's next for you,
you have no story to tell... you have no YOU for the future.
If you challenge fate with Faith and give hope a chance and choose to stay afloat...u may not see a shore...
but surely you'll have a lifeboat approaching you.
YOU will have a story to tell.
Will you allow yourself to be drowned when life is thirsting to gulp you down?
Stay afloat... Let Faith be Stronger than Fate.

I Washed My Hands and Gave it a Thought

At the end of the day when i got home after the sun had already set,
I dropped my burden of a bag and laid it to rest only to know that it will be upon me yet another day...
I long for some nourishment something to satisfy the hunger and the thirst that sometimes is neglected.
So i waste no time in search of food, in search of something that will help me regain my strength.
Something that not only will release all the pain and tension my shoulders carried but also something that will provide my shoulders strength for the days to come.
So i drag myself to the wash basin..... wet my hands....wet my face..... and oh what relief!!!
The turmoil of a long hard day washed away in a matter of seconds....
And i stand and stare at the water running through my fingers....cleansing it...refreshing it.
On turning the water off...i stared at my hands....what were they being cleansed off?
Those hands worked during the day to do good and bad.
It washed away the stains of sin and the marks left behind by the good.
Wash away the dirt of anger, jealousy and hatred towards people i encounter during the day.
It makes way for the hands to do good, wipe away tears and offer love and comfort.
The creases and folds told stories of hard-work but the softness of the palms told of tasks not accomplished yet.
There is lots still to be done and we wash our hands everyday... washing away the past and preparing for the future.

Shadowing Her

Wherever she goes she seems to be shadowed.
Followed by her fate as she walks along.
Her every step is watched closely and its path is lead by what lurks behind her.
She lives everyday differently.... Knowing deep inside that she has nothing to look forward to....
Her future.... Her fate is all ready and decided....
Decided and just waiting for her to come of age.
Decided by her society...
Decided by her 'owners'...
Decided by her shadow.......