Waiting for me in the calm

I have walked ahead of myself, left something behind

I need to slow down and take hold of myself

My mind runs faster than my words ever will

Too fast to know for sure what crosses it at all

I'm lost somewhere between too many thoughts

Too many to comprehend, too many to understand

I'm roaming in circles inside my head,

can't find the center, cant stop it from revolving

And because of this turmoil there is something that has left me

It has escaped me, found a way out

And its safe out there, untarnished

My ability to express.

It's out there waiting for the storm to calm

And on its return it will tell the world what it saw

It will tell of the pain and torture it saw in a soul

It will tell of this story like no other before

Out there, watching me spin, 

I hope that it will stop as easily as it did begin

And as it watches me patiently I long for it to come back home

And help me slow this all down

But from where it stands it urges me to face it all

For before the sun shines, every raindrop must take a fall.

The heart of the galaxy

She wore the galaxy around her,
Draped herself with the stars.
She was the night in all her splendor.
And how he wished he owned her,
How he wished morning never came,
That forever he could hold her.
But she was too great to fathom,
Too beautiful to last forever.
She wore not, her heart on her sleeve,
For fear one day, you having to leave.
She, thus, gave you the moon,
For she can't entrust her heart so soon.
Turn your eyes, lover boy to the moon come every night,
In awe of you, one day she will over come her every fright.
That if you could love the sky for the moon set apart,
You could love her, the night, and own her dark heart.
And she will trust you, boy, soon enough for sure,
And one day she will gather you in the galaxy,
you will be a sleepless night's cure.

The ground moved under me

The ground moved under me
And all hell broke loose.
Nothing was stable anymore,
Nothing was in its place.
Everything's amiss and everything's a mess.
Thee ground moved under me and all I can do is digress.

Everything moved, some in the way and some out of it.
Some changes happened for the better and some for the worse.
What a relief from always having to shift ground.
The ground moved under me,
Can't decide if this is a boon or a curse

For the 1st time I hadn't made an effort to move.
Move from where I was to where I want to go.
For the first time I let myself be directed.
The ground moved under me,
My place, my position was now corrected.

I stand still now waiting for a sign,
That my path is ready and designed
Well enough to let me move and walk along a rocky groove.
For when the ground moved under me
Debris and broken hearts were left behind
Yet under the destruction,
there is a path I must find.

Between their earphones

They walk past each other almost every day
Not a smile exchanged, not a word goes either way.
But between their ear phones, thoughts alike
Playlists so similar, it's difficult for cupid not to strike.

Their music comforts, each of them for their own reasons.
Their music brings solace through the calm and rough seasons.
But how the world wishes they heard each others tastes!
How the beat they walked to,
Ran at the same rhythm and pace!

That the lyrics they related to,
Were but words they both knew,
Placed the right way,
sentences they'd rather listen to, than say.
Little did they know, this boy and this girl,
That between their earphones, ran music of the world.

But the music that open their souls
Waited for them,
If only they open their eyes and looked up for once.
And saw each other walking past,
If only they would take a hunch

That maybe, just maybe, if you unplugged your earphones,
You might just hear music pass you by
And know in that instant that your life's song just said 'hi'.
And respond, please, to your heart's plea
To listen to each other, and of listening alone, be totally set free.

Now they listen together to the music they love,
They sing and they dance with no care in the world
For once they were strangers between their earphones
But now they are lovers of not music alone.

In an unguarded moment

Find me in an unguarded moment,
Find me when I'm me.
Talk to me when I'm sober and silent,
And you'll love me for being me.
When nothing is hidden and all walls have come down,
Listen to the words I speak
And the secrets that leave my mouth.
For when those walls rise up again
Very few know why and how,
Many more though, wish that they were that lucky
To have known me inside out.

Find me in an unguarded moment,
Where the truth is seen and not so much spoken.
Find me when my body sleeps but my soul is strongly awoken.
And in that moment gather all that you can,
Gather my thoughts and gather my tears
And if you're kind enough, take my hand.

Sit by me in my unguarded state
And secure this circle of two.
For these walls fall for the rare, the very unfortunate few.
Unfortunate now, for they bear the burden of knowing more,
More than the face, from under the surface,
The more that took so long to let go.

The Ground Reality

"No, we couldn't practice again today, we should just stop practicing on Monday mornings I guess, the ground is never ready for us, the previous night's wedding leftovers are still covering half the ground and grease and oil from all the rich food always leaves the ground smelling and dirty"

This article stems from a conversation I overheard while traveling in a train one day. A girl, in her sports jersey and shorts was returning home from her routine morning cricket practice and was grumbling over the phone to her friend who presumably asked her how her early morning training went.

Its really sad that a child must miss out on her sports training because some wedding organizer didn't know that he was using a play ground for the reception of the wedding.

It is a fact today that open playgrounds and compounds are so much more affordable and accommodating for the huge weddings we have as compared to the leading hotels in the city. It is also true that some of the best playgrounds in the city are also on numerous 'Top 5 wedding reception grounds' listings, often selected over 5 star hotels and party halls.

Let's be practical, we aren't all millionaires, but we all want a guest list of 1000+. We don't have the space indoors, so hey, 'Amchi Mumbai', lets go book some public ground for this party man!
Hello!!!! Clean up when you're done will ya?

(Image used for representation purpose only)Image source: http://www.telegraphindia.com/1150206/jsp/saltlake/story_1614.jsp#.VTNS1yGqqko

It's simple, if you can't respect the purpose of open grounds in the 1st place don't organize your party there. Live and let live, Party and Clean up!

It is not so much the couple to blame that a wedding reception is on a school or college ground. A number of play ground owners will vouch that its a growing business to rent out the grounds for parties. The income further helps the institution itself. Many government aided institutions will actually complain of receiving insufficient grants from the government and thus have to make arrangements to collect funds for the expenses of building maintenance and newer teaching technologies in meeting with the times. I no longer know who to hold responsible!

The recent development plans in Mumbai have an action plan of closing down a number of open spaces and play grounds through the city. Now, not only will there be fewer grounds to party at but much fewer grounds to play at. Think about it!

If you're one who's guilty of leaving a premise a mess after a party, you have no right then to say that children these days don't go out and play like we used to. It's no doubt that over the years open spaces have turned parking lots, parks have turned high rise properties, simple plots of green land have sacrificed themselves to the industrial sector.

(Image used for representation purpose only)
Image source: http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/newfoundland-labrador/clean-up-garbage-after-public-parties-musgrave-harbour-mayor-1.2721551

The bigger picture here is that, we're all out of space. We're out of recreational space.

It's time you gave it a thought. Your wedding shouldn't be about how grand and expensive you can make it out to be or how many guests you can accommodate. Keep it elegant, special, intimate and more importantly, sensitive to the environment and the public who probably use the ground for recreational purposes.

Party, but let them play!

This night's on your side

How wonderful it is when the moon orchestrates it all.
It brings the tide in and brightens up the place,
It places every star out there to such perfection,
Like a dimly lit dance floor.
It sends the lonely home, to their windows,
It bids goodnight to the young at heart,
But it brings together those who see it in someone else's eyes.
The night puts together your date,
Makes it look like it's all the work of fate.
It quietens the talkative, gives volume to the critters of the night.
Yet more is spoken between this silence,
The silence of a moon lit night.
Where two hearts may sit side by side,
slowly slipping their palms onto each others side.
And one may shiver to build the courage to speak,
to break the silence and say three words
And the other may be counting on it with all her spirit,
Hoping that they are the words rarely heard.
For how else can you thank the moon
For making this night so beautiful,
For bringing it all together to be the reason for the things you're about to say.
How else can you give back to the moon what it has given you,
But tell her,
You love her.

This night's on your side. The morning may not be.
Take courage, say it,
"You're beautiful, I love you, will you marry me?"

Picture found on Pinterest

Just a shore away

I'm a mess but I have no intention to always be one.
I'm gonna take my time with this but I know what lies beyond.
I may sound like a sinking ship,
But I'm afloat and I'm sailing onward.
There's a land waiting for me, not too far away,
And the sun shines brighter there, brighter than any land's day.
And I'm rowing quickly, directing my sail,
The winds of change are trying my patience,
But I'm an able heart in progress.
It took me so long to get on this boat,
To move at all in fact.
But now that this boat has sailed, I'm not turning back.
My hearts in the water now swimming to the shore,
Faster than me, before me it must go.
For it will find a place for me to rest,
A place that offers me nothing but the best.
And I trust my heart to lead me on,
It always has and never left me forlorn.
This sailor's going home,
home where sunrises are more than a day's dawn.
This sailor has over come more than just a passing storm.

A+ for the Asus Zenfone 2

Among the number of smartphones that have recently entered the market, the Asus Zenfone2 is one of the long awaited and yet worthily hyped phone of the season.

#CantWait4Zenfone2

The Asus Zenfone 2 boasts of a number of features and technologies that haven’t failed to impress and have, to a large extent, wowed tech gurus and phone critics all over India. While trying to determine how good a phone is or how worth the price a phone is, one must take into consideration a number of aspects and also compare it to the other phones in the market. In comparison and in individual performance, the Asus Zenfone2 has proved to be a good purchase and a very reliable one as reviewed by many over the internet.

Redefine your smartphone experience
With the Asus Zenfone 2 be sure to redefine smart phone experiences. Following are some of the features you cannot miss out on in this excellence of a phone.

1. 4GB Ram
The Asus Zenfone 2 is the world’s 1st smart phone that has a 4GB ram. This means you can multi task without having to deal with a lagging processor or a slow speed movement while switching between apps and other windows on your smart phone. This feature not only ensures multi-tasking but also speedy access to more than two open apps, simultaneously.

2. Design
The Asus Zenfone 2 has a unique design that enables one to hold it very comfortably. The back of the phone is curved so that it fits within your palm easily. Its sleek edges give a very classy look. The metal hairline detailing at the back ensures that no finger print marks are left behind on the back cover and also gives enough grip for a safe handling of the phone.

3. Camera
The camera on the Asus Zenfone 2 is built with zero shutter lag which means you can capture what so many other phones can’t. It has the industry-leading Low Light mode of capturing which enables you to get clearer pictures at night and low light situations. You can finally get rid of the pictures that were deprived of their night ambience because of old school ‘Mr. Flash’.
With a 13 MP rear camera and a 5 MP front camera, clicking good pictures is now child’s play.

4. Battery life
The battery is a long lasting inbuilt one that cannot be separated from the body. It charges up to 60% in about 39 minutes. Choosing the Asus Zenfone 2 will promise you more time with your phone than the time it spends connected to the charger. Now you can do so much more with a fast charging phone and a battery of 3000 mAh capacity.

5. Display
The display of the Asus Zenfone 2 is a 5.5 inch display with a resolution of 1080x1920 pixels. It’s bright and clear and allows for good graphics. The colors are not harsh on the eyes and are very vibrant and pleasing. It adds to the overall experience of an excellently built smart phone.

Other features include 32 GB storage, a processor of 2.3GHz and an Android 5.0 operating system.

In conclusion, the Asus Zenfone 2 can enhance your smart phone experience and take you to the future sooner than you think.

You can check more details by clicking on the following link:
http://www.asus.com/Phones/ZenFone_2_ZE551ML/

The past in its place

Leave it behind,
Let it go,
Let the past be the past,
And let your present not be harassed.
When the past is in its place, the future will always seem brighter,
But be sure to leave it behind.
Let not the burden of yesterdays mistakes
Take a toll on your heart.
Blame not your heart for the words you said and the things you did.
You did what your heart felt fitting at every point in your life.
How can you hold it responsible just because it no longer feels right?
Forgive yourself for the times you put everything before your heart,
Forgive yourself for when you left your heart behind.
Allow yourself the space to feel,
To feel pain and to know it's real.
But do not stay there longer than you deserve
For pain is temporary and for you there's an abundance of joy reserved.
Move on, move out, move onward,
The future beckons, a better state of mind calls.
Stay not stagnant within trying and testing thoughts
Seek happiness, seek light, seek grace.
Trust me, it will be a battle overcome and well fought.

You're almost there

Lost somewhere between thoughts and actions,
Wandering slowly not knowing where to go,
With eyes towards the sky and feet glued to the ground,
How I wish wings would lift me higher,
Higher above this soil,
Higher above this atmosphere,
Where the air is cooler and the world rounder,
Where horizons curve and the world seems unending.
How I wish I could sit among the clouds and bless the ones I love!
How I wish I could look down and tell right from wrong,
And call out to those who walk the same way as I did,
And tell them what they should and what they shouldn't
Do as I did.
But we receive not this privilege to warn
The unlearned and the inexperienced.
For each must learn the hard way and all must walk the long way,
And someday sit among the clouds to watch the naive children of the earth,
Slowly wandering their way to the end.
Struggling not to fall and looking towards the skies for help.
But blind to the onlookers from above who wish nothing but to bless.
Someday, children, you will find your way home.
Safely, surely, soundly, keep walking, you're almost there.

Love me with Art

Bring me books,
Read to me if you like,
Write me poetry or let me write it myself 

Inspire me.
Buy me paints, more and more of it on end,
And don't forget a canvas if you can.
I don't want flowers or chocolates as such,
I don't even want you to fuss over me that much,
But bring me a journal and sketch papers, if you please,
It will mean more to me than the sight of the seas,
Bring me clay and paint brushes too,
Knives and wood, and a carving blade, will you?
Bring me earrings and I may never wear them,
Bring me beads and for you I'll string them,
Give me a camera and let me be,
I'll love you more through the lens I'll see.
Love me differently for I care not for anything else.
Love me with art and I'll love no one else.

The love of your soul

You could not have been in love,
You were too young,
Too young to know,
Too young to want to know.
You could not have been loving,
As much as you were in awe.
For you had seen none like her,
None like her to the least.

Your eyes looked for fascination,
Your heart looked for wonder,
But the soul cared not for these.
The soul yearned for love,
The soul longed and hungered

But the body is weak,
The flesh too naive,
You fell prey to the desires of this world,
To please the heart and to please the eyes,
And a soul cried out from deep inside,
"Stay away, she not the one, not your prize",

And the universe who for long kept her away,
Now decides to brighten your day.
But your hands are full with yet another.
You've missed her again, from your nose, right under.
And the soul is begging of you to stay without,
Empty your hands and be still with no doubt,

And one day she will come by and you'll be the apple of her eye,
And finally your hands will be able to hold
That beauty, that fulfillment, that love of your soul.

I'll never say...

Don't know how or where you are,
Don't know if you ' re wishing upon the same star,
Don't know if you dream about me anymore,
Or of my love for you you'll ever know.
But I had my chance and I blew it bad,
Took you for granted every moment I had.
Not realizing you could go away,
Pack your bags and choose not to stay.
I didn't think for even once,
I didn't guess, didn't take a hunch,
That I could make it that easy for you
To let go and give a damn no more,
That I would be praying every night
For you to remember that I just might
Just might, even if it's a tiny sum,
Miss you, heart beats racing like a drum.
And I lose my breath thinking you don't
Think of me the least, but you really won't.
Don't know if you'll ever return
Don't know, if like me, you'll yearn
To see a face even among a thousand few
Honey, how I wish you just knew.
I still love you.

A Grey Area, My Light of Day

You ran away and changed your name
You wanted out, out of this game
You cared not for the one left behind
You thought nothing of the emptiness I would find.
You ran away from your fears
Didn't for once think of the past year
You packed your bags and your sorry ass too
My friends are glad the stars rid me of you.
I hate you now more than ever
Not because you left, no that was just a quiver
Not because you failed to see
what you have done to me.

But because you've chosen to un-friend.

You've chosen how and when it must come to an end.

And you gave me no say and no band aids either

My words couldn't express and my feeling could neither.

I'm stronger now, maybe more conservative
But that's a change with which I'm ready to live.

Because I've lost a friend, an irreplaceable one

Will find none like you, under a million suns.

And though my heart is heavy with hate.

My prayers for you are light, they fly up with all good faith.
So think not, for once, that I love you more than ever.
Think not also, that I hate you, no, never!
Let's just say, I've found a way,
A grey area is my light of day.

Bird of the Sky

How jealous they are and how selfish I am.
To have you, they yearn
But to charm like me they must learn
For you don't just fall for anyone
You look for yourself in the ones who want you.
But not everyone was given a part of you.

Not everyone was as lucky as I to have a destiny with you in it.
No one is fortunate enough to have found you before I did.
No one helped you find yourself better than I did.
And I think then, that I am deserving of your affection.
I know then, that I have earned your love.
Why then should I worry of anything.

And so I do not care for your moments in leisure,
I trust that your mind, body and heart are faithful to me.
I declare my trust in you like I declare my love for God, openly and devoutly.
You are a free bird, my love, and my love will be the clouds you fly among.
For I am by you through it all, the high skies and the steep falls.
Though mine, you are a bird of the sky, and every morning you must take flight
The day has you to entertain, but you are mine come every night.

Take the Digi Route

If there’s one thing we’re all sick of in our country, it’s the long queues at government service offices, the pesky officials and also the ever increasing need for documents at every institution or office. Identity on paper is always an issue, solving civil grievances are time consuming, filing a complaint puts yourself in a soup and entering a police station doesn't always make you feel safe.

In an age like the one we live in now, should these really be problems anymore? Not really! We are a developing country who needs to speed up this development. Long queues and corrupt officers can be done away with if only we managed a well planned and executed digital governance system.

Following are some of the benefits that I think we could enjoy if out government services went digital.

1. Speedy Processes
No more waiting for a year till your papers are finally verified or in order, no more long queues at government offices, no more hassles and worries. By taking processes online, work can be done faster and would be so much more convenient to both, the citizen as well as the government.

2. No more corruption
If payments are done online, it provides a safe and secure platform, with official records and statements. This in turn ensures no black money moves in the market and that the government officials don’t ask for bribes or accept any ‘tokens of appreciation’.

3. Verified identification
The recent U.ID. campaign has ensured that every individual in the country has a unique identification number. This is proof of you being a citizen of this country and thus no extra identification verification is required. Using this code, one can easily get personal documents processed digitally rather than manually and save so much of time and effort.

4. Scope for technological development
The transfer of governance and government services to the digital arena allows for more job opportunities for programmers and information Technology experts. When more funds are invested into this field, more development will be seen there.

5. Economical
A lot of money is spent on traveling to a government office or a ‘Seva Kendra’, or to print documents and submit them. All of this can be done away with, if only these processes were converted to digital processes.  No more printing and wastage of paper. Online records and online searches can help locate profiles and documents.

It will be difficult and tasking for an entire country of people to gain access to these digital processes, once materialized. But nothing is impossible. Once the initiative is taken and the determination planted, there’s no going back. There is a lot of scope for digitization in India, but it is not something that can take place in a year or less.

However, once materialized, it can do away with a number of shortcomings in the current governance system and make life so much easier for the common citizen of India.

Intel is way ahead of our thinking and has already taken te initiative time and again to digitize India. Follow this link to know more http://www.intel.in/. Lets take the Digi route to a #DigitalIndia !

Impress me like the Night

Speak to me,
Stump me with your words,
Silence me if you can,
Whisper if you must,
But please, say the right things.

Take me some place else,
Let's travel with words.
Talk to me like you're talking to the moon.
Let me listen to the stillness of the night.
And let it be in your voice.

Sing to me if you can
But in the language of the stars.
And when words escape your lips,
Let them kiss my skin and take me high.
When your words touch my ears let them cause a shiver.

And if your words can't do these things then let them not try.

I'd rather you not than ruin my experience of the night.
But if you must and if truly you can do it right,
Speak to my heart, speak to my body, speak to my mind.
But darling, speak!
I don't care that love is blind,
Love must never leave words behind.

Together Apart

Separated only since the last two years, my best friend and I have been sharing a unique friendship since we were 15 years old.

Today, 20 and studying, we interact via social networks and calls because a plane ticket to New York is worth double my college fees.  But that does not deter us; we are the same, just as we were when she was here with me in Mumbai.

#Together, we went to and from college every day; together we hung around the best eateries in the city; together we walked every known lane on every known evening.  We, as many would call us, have always been a tight bunch by ourselves. And no one, and I mean it, no one could separate us, not even distance.

Staying in New York now, she barely has the time to breathe. Choosing a foreign city over your home city means serious business and she did not go there to while away her time. From college applications, entrance exams, application assignments to interviews, lodging facilities, part-time job look outs etc., she literally has to fight for time to speak to me.

An understanding friend that I've always been, I didn't mind not talking to her on a daily basis; this was her chance at putting her future together and the last thing I wanted to do was get in her way or distract her for that reason. She too, knew well what had to be prioritized at the moment and so we both knew that our long calls and chats had to be put on hold for a while, at least until she had herself settled well there.

We looked out for each other, all the time. And that’s one of the reasons; we still are #together even though oceans apart.

Things are a lot better now, she’s used to the new lifestyle there, she’s made a number of friends and we don’t talk on a daily basis. But that still hasn't changed the relationship we share.

Till date, I know that I can count on her; I can count on her advice, on her counsel and on her company in spirit. Distance may have separated us by location and time but we both stand testimony to a relationship of togetherness while being apart.

Ask me today and I will still say she’s the closest I have. In fact I will even tell you that we have probably grown closer since the separation than when we stayed in the same city.

I do miss her; I miss that bubbly girl that brightened up everyone’s day. And I can’t wait for the day that she comes back home. But I wouldn't rush it. She’s home no matter where she is, because home is where the heart is and her heart is still here with me.

Check out https://housing.com/ #together with your loved one for new options in housing.

Let's be Twins Together

There is no one who understands the meaning of ‘together’ as well as a twin. Fortunately for you, I am a twin. And I came into this world #together, with my twin.

Growing up together, living together for 19 years, sharing the same mother and father, the same lifestyle, sometimes the same clothes, , the same room, the same friend circle and the same schedules. Both of us take ‘togetherness’ to a whole other level. Like I said earlier, no one knows #together like a twin.

Having a twin, in a nutshell, is like being born with a best friend; the only difference is that she looks the same, if you get what I mean. And there on until you’re of an age to choose your own attire, your parents will dress you up to look even more alike than you already are.  Together, both of us looked like the cutest pair of dumplings strolling around the block.

Twins are known to be clones of each other; however we like to call ourselves ‘Twindividuals’. We are similar but different.  Our differences help us complete each other. We are halves of the same cell, two bodies of one being; one perfect being!

My twin sister has always been by my side by choice. She has been with me through the toughest and the thickest of every obstacle that came in my path and has been my optimistic ray of light. She held my hand and walked with me. When I had to walk in the dark, she became my guiding light. She isn't obliged to, but she has forever been there for me even when I want to be alone. Can you think of anything that defines ‘Together’ better than this? I think not!

She has been my pillar of strength when all hope failed, my inspiration when I saw none and my bridge over trouble waters. I don’t know where both of us will be 10 years from now. Married maybe? Our own spouses, new homes, new lifestyles but yet, no one will understand how we continue to be ‘together’.  Our hearts beat together in time, from the time it started in the womb.  We share a relationship that no one else can boast off.

#Together we have been through the ups and downs of our ‘Twindividual’ lives. #Together we have seen two different views but known just one life, #Together we have come to this day, where we are inseparable and undivided.

If you are not a twin, you will never know, but the simplest way to make you understand is by telling you that the word ‘Together’ runs so much deeper than just being with each other, it is living for each other.

Check out https://housing.com/  #together with your loved one for new options in housing.

There's just one way from here: Up

We aren't all perfect. There are sides of ourselves that we are proud of, and some we hide behind the shadows. There are parts of our lives we do not wish to ever recall, and some moments that we cherish for a lifetime.

There was a dark moment in my life that I would never want to recall. But it was when the light at the end of the tunnel came nearer, that I found a moment to cherish for a lifetime. That light was a friend, a friend I've known so long, yet ignored forever; Me.

It was soon after a heart break and a series of misfortunes that I experienced the lowest I’d ever felt in life this far. My grades were falling, my attention span in class dwindling and my interest in the people around me- scarce. I was losing all drive in life and till date I don’t know who or what to blame. I have always blamed myself. A saving grace however, could not see me this way.

One day, I decided to give myself the time to listen. Not to a counsellor, not to a priest, not to an elder person but to a friend, the friend I knew in me. The friend, I thought, had left with my enthusiasm. But she was there, sitting in silence. “You don’t need to do this to yourself”, she said. I listened.  “You are greater than the things that bring you down and you are worth so much more than you think you are.

The world doesn't need you; they will get by without you. But you cannot go a day without having yourself, without having yourself happy, content and satisfied, and no one can bring you this contentment but the friend you find in yourself. Stop blaming her for the things you've been through, at every step in your life you chose to do what was right at that moment, no one saw what was to become of your decisions. Do not condemn yourself for the things you did not see coming. Forgive yourself.”

I opened my eyes and felt a calm I hadn't felt in a very long time. A rush of serenity ran through me as I felt lighter and more importantly, content.

Never had I felt so optimistic about life. I guess you have to reach your lowest point to appreciate the highest points you've been to.  There’s only one way to go when you’re down in the dumps and that is up. I am forever indebted to the friend I found that day who showed me that this was not the end of the road.

New beginnings are always a scare, but they are a pool of optimism if you learn to see it that way.

Check out https://housing.com/lookup for new options in housing. 

The Big Leap

I have always been one to go out of my way to help people, I don't mean to boast but that's just how I am. Be it the people I love or the people I care about, sometimes they could be just acquaintances or not so close buddies, I always believed that if you can, why shouldn't you? I was known as miss goody two shoes, everyone knew they could count on me and mostly rely on me, be it for class notes, class updates, lecture rescheduling etc.

Until one day, someone went too far, and decided to challenge my 'so far, undying commitment to help'. And this did not go down with me too well. I always helped people because I felt like it and not because of appreciation or any self credit, in fact many a times I have gone un-noticed and it did not bother me at all. This kind of attitude earned me a lot of respect in front of my teachers, friends and classmates. But the day a bunch of them choose to disrespect me, my whole mindset of helping changed.

I realized that I can't keep going out of my way to help people especially if they don't help themselves first. These kind of people tend to take advantage of your good nature and soon grow so dependent that they forget the good in your deeds and see it as you are obliged to do it for them.

I also learned that you cannot keep everyone happy, that is not your responsibility towards them. Of course you can try but when you can't, you just can't and you have to leave it at that. Help, but learn to see people through. Know that self help is sometimes the best help.

Some may say that this change in me is not good and that I should continue to be helpful and helpful I shall always be, just a little more cautious now, though.

Don't let the thought of what other people think of you stop you from being who you are and mostly don't settle for people who do not know how to respect others as human beings. We are all the same, no one greater than the other, then why must one be treated as a servant and the other a master? You don't have to be the underdog all the time, take a stand, be a man, #StartANewLife !

Change is never bad, sometimes we're afraid of it and sometimes we're confused, but you will never know until you decide to #StartANewLife. Take a leap, if your life's not heading somewhere, change things. Go ahead and be the bigger person, don't be afraid to move on from the person you have always been.

Changing your lifestyle or your home is a big deal too. Look Up, Housing is your answer

Here's a link to a site that can help you #StartANewLife: https://housing.com/in 

And have a look at this video :

I don't know Me without You

The park will remember us not by our names
But that we waited only 15 minutes after the sunset every weekend.
The cafe around the corner will not remember my order
But will remember that we sat there long after the coffee had its effect on us.
The promenade won't recall our faces
But it will know how many steps we took there hand in hand.
The tea stall won't remember the small sum I still owe him
But he will miss us smiling back at him for the warm beverage in the rains.

They all know us, 

Though they know not just me
They know me as I am with you
For them, another cannot be.
They don't recognize me, they don't treat me the same,
It hurts to be forgotten, when you were remembered by no name.
Unrecognizable, they say I have become.
How do I tell them I can't face them, I'd rather run.
How do I tell them I can't recognize myself anymore

I knew me when I was with you, with you, these places knew me even more.

Say it with Colour

He took some colored powder in his hands
and smeared it softly across her cheek.
"Yellow, for the day they smeared your skin with turmeric"
He took some more now, of a different color
and smeared it across her other cheek
"Pink for the way your face glows when you see me"
With some green powder now
He strokes her arm
"For the future we will share together"
As he places his hand in purple
and reached out for her other hand
"For the little ones we will share our next Holi's with"
And finally he took some red
and with his thumb sealed her forehead
"For the day that you and I became us"
She looked like a colorful mess now.
"Happy Holi", he whispered.
But nothing made her feel more vibrant
than the kiss that followed.

Medium:Wax Crayons (melted over canvas)
Art: Faye Brooke D'Cruz

Of Old Structures and Stories

The old stand tall, they stand mighty strong,
Built with more than just bricks and cement but with stone and grit.
The old are stable, they never fear the forces of nature,
because they have been made to withstand the test of time.
A day shall come though, when new architects will want to bring down the old,
For a change, for some space, for a race.
And the old, though firm and stubborn, will come down like rubble.
The new will replace what once was all.
And suddenly change will take place because of a fall.
But the life of the once known structure will be described for generations to come.
The new live lives of a really short span,
Replaced sooner than the time they took to replace the old.
So much for looking more contemporary and bold!
So much, however of structure in stone, think for once of Stories untold.
Beneath the rubble of a destroyed site, is one mans art, architecture if I might.
Under the debris of sand and cement lie a hundred men's labour and sacrificed strength.
Buried now, under the change, is a generation that did not want to be exchanged.

You take the Weather with You

Now, the days are gloomy and the nights are cold,
When you were here, so was something like spring.
And I can't wait for you to return,
I can't wait for the weather that you bring.

It won't be autumn, it won't be winter
Nor will it be the summer or rain
But it will be a weather that will be whiter than snow,
No matter where you are, that weather will follow.

And bless them who walk the same land you go to
For they will experience the weather I yearn for
No spring or summer could bring such warmth
No winter, the shivers down my spine can draw.

I wait for you, season after season,
For then, when you will be here.
The weathers change, they come and go
But my favorite weather is when you are near.

The Battle of the Night.

I salute you O great warrior, for you have lived the night through.
Your eyes have opened to the dawn of a new day, I am happy for you.
Dear warrior, I know, the night was harsh and cold.
But, you've come this far, you survive every night, so strong and so bold.

Great warrior, they do not know
of the battles you fight before rest.
The thoughts of the day, the hopes and expectations that they
have, by your conscience are put to the test.

For no battle can be won, when the enemy is yourself,
No warrior can kill, not when he himself is screaming for help.
Because the battle of the night, brings more than just fright,
It asks for courage to sleep and to awake with more might.

But you survive, you survive the raging wars and the battles of death,
Where thoughts drive away the enemy and peace is made with self.
And that victory dear warrior, is to be celebrated with dance and song.
For you chose to sleep, and do to your enemy no harm or wrong.

A Letter to no one in particular

To
No one in particular,

I trusted you with my people, with my nation, with my money,
You insulted my religion.
I'm upset, I'm angry and I don't think you know how powerful I am.
I don't think you know who I am.
I can overthrow you, the way I placed you at that chair.
I can attack you when you least expect it,
But I'm better than you, never to stoop to your level.
You proved my choice wrong, and your losing all chances of redeeming yourself.
The end is near, promised by one more powerful than me.
My end will be better than yours, I'm sure of it.
This is no threat, this is no warning, this is not even for you.
Unless of course you've got the fit for this shoe.
If such is the case, then it's time you rethink your actions
There is only so much a people can take, before the wrath of their reactions.

From
No one in particular.

Heavy Hearted

Step by step I try to make my way forward on this road
But it's all too slow, can't take it a pace faster
My way is clear but my legs are numb
I'd rather stay than even try to move
But the crowds won't stop
They move back and forth,
With no care for this stone man.
They pass me by with not a twitch of the eye,
I'm just another misfit.
I feel heavier, my feet buried below the surface.
Holding me back, keeping me behind,
The world moves on,
Faster, more easily and mostly with no regrets.
But I can't move.
I can't take this step,
At least not without regrets.
This will take me time, moving on,
And no, I don't care that you've all moved already.
I'm numb,
I'll move when I can feel again,
When I can feel love again,
When I can love again.

Relationship Version 0.1.1 expired. Update not required.

You're so many Instagrams ago
You're SMS' ago
And so many whats app chats ago
You're in my browsers history now,
Wonder why I've not cleared it out anyhow.

You as old as snail mail
but you left faster than email.
You're so many blog posts ago,
Even the snap chat ghost will know.

You've been Time-hopped,
Boy, the Temple runner has finally stopped
But you continue to give me all that G-talk.
Why don't you go take a walk.

It's like we we were something out of a Fanfic
But we lost Pinterest with time.
Skype could not keep us in touch,
Neither could iTouch

But if I were to trade all I had,
for something new, maybe an iPad
I'd ask instead
For more memory.

The mind can store more than you know.
But expandable memory can be carried and discarded on the go.

Our virtual world still has us
but I have none of you

I'm happier this way, I swear! yahoo!

There are reasons

'There are reasons', she said.
Reasons she can't watch those romantic comedies anymore
Reasons she won't walk down that street
Reasons she'd rather travel alone.
There are reasons she can't allow herself to be quiet
And reasons she won't engage in certain conversations.
'There are reasons', she said, she can't eat there anymore.
And reasons she won't let anyone hold her hand.
And reasons she won't let anyone carry her or hold her for that matter,
And reasons she can't listen to love songs,
And reasons she can't stand two people kissing,
And reasons she won't let anyone charm her.
She's lying.

There was just one reason and he was the cause of it all.

The Chair

I sit across the table,
rehearsing every line I've come here to say.
Moments from now, my heart will spill
and I will tell you things you've wished to hear.
My heart's in my throat and a shiver runs down my spine.
My nerves are restless, does this place have some wine?

Focus.

Practice.
"Hi, I love you." No.
"Hi, I know I've taken too long to say this, but, I really like you" No.
"I love you"
Uggh!
Calm down.

I stare blankly at the chair, you're a little late, I'm grateful.
Closing my eyes, hoping the waiters don't think me crazy.
I think about you and about me. And that I've finally come to this day,
To the day I'm ready to declare my love for you.
Butterflies.
Where are you?

"Can I have some wine please"

You've waited so long for me, whats 30 minutes for me to wait for you, right?
Thanks for always being there.
...
...
...
...
...
...
No thanks for leaving that chair empty today.
"Waiter, keep the change"

The Inside Story

It's been two years now since the creation of this blog and its 1st post and in these two years it has helped me grow as a person and as a writer, along with providing me with a vent out, 'express yourself space'.
To all of you who frequent this blog and who give me feedback or even tell me how much you loved or hated each post, Thank you! You're the reason this blog still exists and celebrates two years today.

There are a few lucky people who get to know what inspires most of my blog posts, others take lucky guesses.
For most of you who are still wondering, this post will tell you what inspired my favorite post of every month.

January 2014:
Under the influence
When I wrote this post I was driven by a disgust for the influence that narcotics have on people and how a feeling of ecstasy that otherwise can be attained through much natural occurrences is now attained through drugs and substances that are so harmful to the human body.

February 2014:
Beauty, born of the dark
In this post, I have used a lot of imagery to explain but a very simple emotion: heart break.
Loss and the heaviness of heart inspired this post and it became a crowd favorite mostly because it very subtly expresses what the heart never finds the words to say. It also displays the heart to be a creature that finds its peace only in the stillness of the night or in silence. Further it is also a search for beauty within the recesses of ones insecurities.
Love's fake identity
In this post I have personified love and portrayed him to be a cheater or one who changes colour as and when he wishes to. It also talks about how love can fool you and make you believe things. I had fun writing this post.

March 2014:
She doesn't know
This post rose from the idea of ignorance. How you can be affected by something only through the knowledge of it and how we are either protected or harmed by the knowledge of somethings. The post names random instances but if you read each of them through, you can build an instance around each of them.

April 2014:
Little Girl
This post also got the highest number of views in whole of 2014.
It was inspired by a very special friend who's humility is something I could tell the world about. Her age here is irrelevant for she forever portrays herself to be a child of God. Till date she continues to be an inspiration to me.
It's impossible to not fall in love with a girl like her, and what's even more fascinating is that she always keeps you in awe of her. Shes a walking talking wonder.

May 2014:
Time Traveler
Time traveler was written keeping a very special friend in mind. A friend who gave up too soon. While we all worry about our future, there are some of us who would live a lot better had we lived in the moment and worry less about what's to come.

June 2014:
For as long as we have voices
The book Eat Pray Love came to me at the most appropriate time. They say books know when to come to you. This post was inspired by a quote in the book and it just made me realize how important it is to be thankful for as long as you really can. People leave and maybe you'll lose your voice, time, distance, a lot of obstacles could come your way. So it's better to express your gratefulness now then to wait.

July 2014:
Match Maker
This post actually stemmed from a joke between me and two other friends. However if there really existed a match maker this is what it would be like.
Saving Grace
This post is actually a really late post. The experience shared here was a life changing one that took place in the month of April. I was at my lowest point when I received a saving grace. something that changed me forever and for the better. Something you should all know, don't ever give up, even at your lowest things can turn around.

August 2014:
You don't break what's not yours
So many times my friends tell me of how unsure  they are about the person they are dating or whether they should date at all. This post was written especially for them. In my opinion, it's better to wait around and be sure than to jump into a relationship before you know what you really want from it. You save yourself the effort, you save yourself the worry and you save yourself the time. Most of all, you prevent the likelihood of another heart-break.

September 2014:
How He loves you
If you notice, this post addresses the same person it addressed in a post in the month of April. Little Girl. It was written for the same person. This friend of mine grew really ill, so ill that we thought hospitalization would be a must. But prayers went up at the speed of lightning and in a day, this friend grew well miraculously.
I'd like to think that this little girl is loved abundantly by God (He). And that He can do anything for His little girl.
Kisses without borders
This short story was actually written in my creative writing paper in college. I rewrote it out of memory for this blog. From among my very own short stories, it's my favorite.

October 2014:
In the light of Forgiveness
October was a month of redemption. With an autumn theme, I wrote most of my posts to relate to renewal and forgiveness, redemption and finding your way back. This set of posts were my favorite.
'In the light of forgiveness' focuses on the need to find peace with yourself in spite of the turmoil that you put yourself through. Your struggle with your insecurities, your goals, your aspirations all find its way home only once you forgive yourself for all the times you have let your self down. A little self healing never harmed anyone.

November 2014:
The Burden of the Bubble
This post is one of my favorites from the month of November because it's something very personal. Inspite of that, a number of readers messaged me saying it was thoroughly relatable. This post deals with one's independence and fear of letting someone get so close that it gives them the opportunity to control you to a certain extent. I refer to it as a burden because often it comes in the way of you and something that you long for just because of fear.

December 2014:
Writing off rape
With the rise in rape cases being reported in the news everyday, I was drawn toward writing this post. Reading about it in the papers unsettles all of us, but everyone of us know that the people with power in their hands are the only ones who can actually change the scene for us civilians. That is exactly why this post has a verse targeting a powerful man's loved ones. I got a really good view count on this one and a number of people messaged me saying I hit the nail on the head.


A little snippet from my 1st blog post 'Grounded and Uplifting'
Sometimes we get lost in our accomplishments, so lost that we don't realize how high we have risen
And how difficult it is to hear people from way above them!
What's the use of rising above then, if you cant communicate with the ones who helped you get there?
It's better to be GROUNDED and UPLIFTING than lifted and uprooted.

Traces of You.

Gone are all traces of you

Little by little, ridding myself of them.

For long after you left, I still had you.

But I've come a long way now and time has been my friend

I've emptied the drawers, just like I emptied my heart.

I burnt the photos, like I burned some memories.

I sold what could be sold, the way you put a price on us.

And yes, it made up for the price I paid in loving you.

There is nothing left to remind me of you,

even the words of my diary have been torn through and through.

Gone are the flashbacks that once haunted my nights,

gone are the daydreams that came without my plight.

All wounds have healed.

All scars have come clean.

A heart once broken is fit and fine.

A life once yours is now all mine.

If there ever was a time I felt more loved,

Its now.

For I love myself now, more than I did before,

I love myself more than the love you could ever show.

And maybe that was it all along.

Maybe love is what keeps me strong.

My love though, more than yours.

Love for me and all my flaws.

You've made me proud

This year was rough but you've come so far.
Girl, you've made me proud,
Happy to see you here and not where you were.
Into the light and out of fear.

Everyone begins the race,
But not all of us make it through.
You have outdone yourself for sure,
I saw them trying to break you.

They almost succeeded
But girl, how happy I am that you stayed put!
You loved so much and love broke you in turn
But you fixed yourself up so strong, never again to burn.

For you deserve wholeness and not an incomplete air.
You deserve to be one within and not dependent on one with no care.

Girl, I'm proud of you because this time you stood your ground.
You guarded your dignity and demanded respect.
Like a wall that no boulder can bring down.

This year I've seen you become more than I ever thought you could,
This year you've surprised me much more than I ever thought you would.

Brave girl, count your blessings and forget not to be thankful.
For there are those who came for you, there are those who got out.
All in all, they are part of you without a doubt.

Fill your heart with joy before your year goes by.
Celebrate the person you've become,
Rejoice in the obstacles you've overcome.

Take flight, dear little girl
Take flight, dear little heart,
A year has come to an end
But another is here to start.

Rewind

We should have begun where it all ended
We should have started from right now and gone to where we were
That way, the worst would be over and we'd be who we loved,
That way, the world would turn the other way around and we would finally catch up.

If we started where we said goodbye and then loved our way through,
I'd know at first what it would be like without you.
And maybe that would keep me wary of keeping you safe till the start.
I wonder, will I ever be able to rewind my heart?

Your Guardian Angel

Baby girl, You have grown up so well, and I must retire now
Your every step was taken with care, I assured you no scars at all.
But honey, I must leave now, for there are more like you and less like me
And you're a big girl now, taking on everything you see
The world is your oyster or should I say your stage
It's your playground, no mater your age.
And sweetheart, don't be afraid, I know you,
You can slay dragons and cross seas,
You can tear down monuments and dissolve empires,
You can do so much, without me.
My time has come and I have to go, baby girl, don't look so sore.
Hold on a minute, let me give you a blessing
There's just one thing you must have, take my wings.
With my wings on your shoulder you have enough and more
Goodbye, baby girl, you'll be alright, I know.
Look sky wards always and let no frown burden you
When in trouble, know that your guardian angel Loves you.

Writing off Rape

Who gave you the right to take off her clothes?
Who told you you could touch her or even get close?
Don't say she asked for it, don't say it and then smile.
If that the case, then you have asked to be hung, forget a fair trial.

If her clothes or lack of them beckon you near,
Then your mentality is something every woman must fear.
Who told you she's willing, who gave you the right?
No one did! You did what you wanted to on that horrible night.

A rod, a rope, a wring and not a ring.
Where have you come from? what about your upbringing?
Brutal, inhuman, beastly and wild
Were you insanely blind? She was but a child!

I am a woman, a scared one for sure.
I'm not safe anymore, no matter what you politicians assure.
What one man does to me, the others just watch.
Disgusting, they don't help, police won't even sway a torch.

For what happens to me, you don't really care,
You'd rather make me change the clothes I wear.
Excuse me, hello, men at the chair,
One day, it will be your mother, daughter or wife, then will you care?

She's standing her ground

She's done being trampled upon, done being the scapegoat
She's standing her ground now and she doesn't care what you think of her
She's got no one to impress but herself and she will do that her own way.
Right now, standing up for what she knows she wants will suffice.
So don't think you can get away with sweet gifts and kind words to say,
She see much better now, not blinded by the light of day.
This change you may say was not foreseen,
well she's glad she caught you by surprise.
You can't mess with her anymore, at least not unless she lets you,
And trust me, she's better than that.
Her standards are set high, her spirit now unbreakable,
So try her and see what you get, just what she wants to give and nothing more.
The way you treated her said a lot about who you are,
But not enough for you to earn anyone's respect.
So now, when she has freed herself from what bound her for years,
She's praying you come to a realization too.
That people don't belong to you no matter how much you think they do
And you can't have your way, at least not now,
when she has vanished from your everyday.

The Journey

The journey is long, the journey is tough
The path to thread is narrow and rough
But don't let that hold you back from it all
The end will be worth every fall.

On your way you will meet some trouble
But the path is such, your blessings will double
And when you thirst and gravely hunger
The journey will provide from its resourceful treasure.

The path will try you and it will test
Everything that made you believe you are the best
And it will leave you with either of these
You will prove to be unbeatable or you will humble yourself with ease.

And when that happens, your journey will become less of a task

And on your way, there will be no questions asked

You will take each step as each brick comes

And the sound of surrender, you will sweetly hum.

For the journey is not in your hands as much as it is in your heart

It's your legs that move, but your soul that leads from the start

Travel with wonder and awe for all things, they are great.

But don't stop moving thinking it's your fate.

This road is long, but not difficult to travel

You will be taken care of, no matter how tedious the walk on the gravel

The end is not somewhere you've been before

Don't worry though, trust me, it's so much more.

Acknowledge

There are men who died for you,
People who cried for you,
They laid down their lives for you
They took up a fight for you
There are people who pray for you,
People who stay for you
Some make sacrifices for you
Some take a step for you
Some stand up for you
Some draw a seat for you
Some people will be nice to you
Some others not so good
Some will listen to you
Yet some will be misunderstood
Some give their all for you
Some take away from you
Some will betray you
But some will make a way for you.
There are many kinds of people we come across in a single day
Some will enrage you, some will give you a lot to say
But some will come and some will just go
Leaving you, but like never before.
And in these people we hope to see ourselves,
Living in their hearts is how we choose to live. Well,
Then open you eyes, and don't disguise, tell them how grateful you are
For telling them now is better than not telling them at all.
Appreciate. Welcome. Love. Let go.
Acknowledge.

Of Kings and of Kingdoms

It is not easy to rule a land,
To live up to expectations and hold command.
It's not of a weak heart to lead,
Only mighty men may ride a royal stead.
But is it might that truly empowers?
Or is it power that proves ones might?
None! I'd say, it's the heart that always wins the fight.
For a kingdom is nothing without it's heart.
A king must lead and not tear apart
One from his family for reasons of war.
Rather use his mind and heart, a cold war to thaw.
For kingdoms will rise and kingdoms will fall
But he who rules from his heart,
Forever rules the hearts of all.

The Innocent Murderer

They don't know what they are doing. They do not know how burdened I am with guilt.
They make a decision to end it all and then they choose the railway as a spot.
Those victims, who could have been saved by mere conversation,
Now are delivered to death by my hands, my controls, or better still, my not being in control.

In my country it isn't a rare sight to see them, the poor at heart give up their lives
Poverty, unemployment, depression, disease,
all of it are not balanced out by good friends and good counsel.
If it were, I wouldn't have to call myself the innocent murder.

Innocent because I have no intention to kill,
A Murder because I cannot stop the kill from taking place,
especially since the train cannot halt at such short notice.
I don't think i need to tell you what happens next.

Days go by and everyday I fear the weakness of a soul.
For it is the weak at heart that make me a murderer.
Think of me, before you think of laying yourself down.
Think of me before you hear the train's honking sound. 

What They Don't Know

She out there. Taking on the world now, bit by bit, her life is falling into place. She's got the scholarship shes been trying so hard to get and she's got her mind set and ready to take on whatever life throws her way.

She's a fighter, that's what they all call her. They say she knows what she wants and she's out to get it, a successful life! They say the universe works hand in hand with her to make her dreams come true.

If only...

As she sits by the window, she ponders about the number of things they say about her.
How determined she is,
how hardworking,
how focused...
and a small smile, almost pitiful, lines her face. They don't know what she knows.

She knows what a struggle it was, leaving home for a far away place, leaving friends for a better education, leaving family behind for the sake of a future. They don't know the things she left before taking this big step. They don't see her sitting by this window.

They don't know the millions of decisions she took, they don't know the price she had to pay, they don't know what she sacrificed. They don't know how heavy her heart was, saying goodbye, they don't know how deep she drowned herself in fear before getting onto that flight.

They don't know she felt like she wasn't the one in control, they weren't aware that she didn't have a map.

They aren't aware of the boy, the one who made this the most difficult move of all, they don't know about the heart breaker, who kept her here long after she left. They don't know how difficult it was to let go.

They don't know that it is now done. He has been freed. She has been freed.

They don't know just like sometimes, she doesn't know.

And while shes sitting by her window, thinking about all of them, only she knows what it's like to not know and only she knows that sometimes, it's okay to not know.

Suddenly, her smile isn't pitiful anymore, its beautiful!

The Burden of the Bubble

She walked around with a bubble around her. It kept her safe from those who wanted to come too close. She said it was her own space, it's what allowed her to move about in public. She also said she would feel naked without it.

For years she wore it, so long, that no one could remember the time she moved without it.

That part of her life was only for her to remember.

Now, her bubble had grown so strong, that not only was it impenetrable but also her protective gear. She had friends, many of course, for her charm and her smile called for it. But none could invade this space she kept for herself.

Years ago, when she walked without her shield, she was loved. She gave and received love unconditionally, until one day, someone took that for granted, stripped her off her defenses and took away all that she had.

And then, all she had was herself.

She didn't buy this bubble, nor was it gifted to her, it formed on it's own and she grew into it. Suddenly, she didn't want to be loved in return for the love she gave.

But like all fairy tales, that bubble popper had to cross her path, and the world is grateful for him.

He walked by her, bubble and all, and never once took notice of it. He gave her love like she gave it out to the rest, but the love he gave could only be seen and not felt.  Now she felt trapped, what had she done to herself over all these years?

She had locked herself up so hard that now she lived where no one could reach her, not even the ones she wanted to reach out to, herself.

Separated by a thick wall of insecurity, he was not willing to leave her sulking within her a cocoon of her past.
Like a knight in shinning armor, he expressed his desire to love her and never leave her. And after all these years, she saw eyes that loved and waited to see her through no wall at all.

Her bubble begin to choke her, she suffocated in this cell she locked herself up in.
This abyss of darkness, pride, pity and tears,
And before he knew it, his heart skipped at the sight of her pain and without a thought he drew his sword and tore down the walls that threatened to swallow her.

In a split second, she was in  his arms, panting, breathing quick but gradually growing normal.
He held her. For the 1st time, she felt naked and she liked it.

It was okay to be naked this way, when someone's love clothed you and more importantly, fit you perfectly.

A Flower buried beneath a Stone

From a young man to the mother he didn't love enough:

I bring you flowers, flowers for your grave.
Today when your're not here, I'm down on my knees shedding many a tear.
These flowers I bring as a gift to you,
Now when you are but dust in the wind and a breeze that blows through
And I regret where I was when you were flesh and bones,
For then I didn't bring you flowers, I just threw stones.
The biggest stone thrown was sending you away,
To a home for the old, a strange place to stay.
Mama, mama dear, forgive me please, I'm crying, I miss you, I'm down on my knees.

Another stone that hurt you the most
Would have been when I treated you like a ghost,
For when you were near I paid no heed
And now I realize you're all that I need.
Mama, I'm looking at the stone, the one they laid you beneath,
And today I have flowers that I place at your feet.
But in my heart I hope you see,
Mama, I feel tremendously guilty.

I pray that no other man
Ignores the presence of a mother,
For we live this life but once,
And like a mothers love, there is no other.

October Diaries- Post #9: Autumn is mine

Autumn, my love, must you be so beautiful?
They say Spring is the one to eye,
But Spring, I think, is over rated.
Autumn, there's nothing more lovely than change.
How slowly you move, swaying with the music of winter!
Yet your presence is felt, much stronger than seen.
Autumn, damn them who call you the harbinger of the shivers.
For you make me feel all warm on the inside.
Autumn, if time was mine to dictate, Spring would have to watch out.
Autumn, don't tell me you have to go, tell me something I don't already know.
For if there's one thing you've given me, its redemption, it's a will to be free.
No longer does the memory of summer hold me down,
No longer does the rain bring back the frown.
For Autumn is mine forever more.
Autumn, will travel, but will never really leave and go.

Embrace the Light

It's not about the light, it's about what it does to you.
It's not about how bright it is but rather that you can see
The light exists, and yet you live in the dark
It isn't about the silence, It's about what you hark.
Listen, don't just see.
The light heralds, the good in you and me.
Look, smile and acknowledge the way,
Kiss the light, thank it for your sight of day.
Let it in, let it touch your heart.
Light moves, let it be a part
Of your soul, that till this day was hidden
Behind the clouds of doubt and sin.
Redeem yourself, let the light in,
Be born again, light up within.
And lest the light comes to an end,
Don't think darkness is your soul's best friend.
For the darkness is but the absence of light.
It's nothing but the cause of our own fright.
But fill yourself up with an illumination of another kind
And watch how fear is bid good riddance by your mind.
And soon, the darkness under closed eyes
Will be more kind to you under all the world's skies.
For your heart shines, it outshines the best
And darkness will finally be put to the test!

Happy Diwali :)
Photo Credit: Siddhanth Manoj

October Diaries- Post #8: In the light of Forgiveness

Forgive yourself for the pain you put yourself through,
For unloving yourself when someone failed to love you,
For feeling small when the world tried to make you feel that way.
Forgive yourself for the path that you took by mistake,
For not knowing better when you expected yourself to,
For letting yourself down when you wanted to be the best.
Forgive yourself for hurting within and for hurting yourself some more,
For feeling ugly when they stopped calling you beautiful,
For blaming yourself for losing him, when he left of his own accord.
Forgive yourself for brooding and for sighing and for self pity.
Don't regret the time you spent redeeming yourself.
After a storm, take the time to recover, to rehabilitate and to restore.
Remember that the storm is never the end.
It's a second chance, pick up the pieces,
Discard the ones that weigh you down and put together those that make you whole.
And if a storm should come yet again,
It would have to think twice before trying to break you.
For forgiveness doesn't just heal, it empowers.

The Selfiecation

It all happened when someone turned the camera towards themselves instead of pointing it at the subject.
That was the beginning of a revolution.
Unfortunately, this revolution was not as big as the one yet to come.

When that person spun the camera around, little did he know what he was doing.
Of course his action resulted in the 'self portrait' but he didn't anticipate the 'Selfie'.

The beauty of this action was more than in just turning the camera around, it was in the fact that you did not know the result of your capture until you printed it.

The fun in the original Selfie lay also in the fact that it caught the 'you' that was originally beautiful and not the 'you' you considered beautiful.

Today, front cameras on phones (the bigger revolution) have eliminated the spontaneity of a Selfie. It has even allowed for editing a Selfie. The term suddenly doesn't describe the process anymore.
How about an Self-Editee?

The real 'you' has today turned into the 'you' that you want to show the world.

With the click of a few buttons you can change the color of your hair, the color of your skin, erase the blemishes, tint the pic, highlight your assets, hide your insecurities, purse your lips and voila: The Self-Editee!

The edit doesn't always happen via technology. The saddest part of the Selfie generation today is the pains taken to prepare for a Selfie, the make up, the dress up, the fake smiles, the poses!

It's was fun until someone took it too far, maybe to the top of a 12 floor building, maybe atop a railway line, maybe somewhere even more dangerous. The acknowledgement of a Selfie became more important than the purpose of taking the Selfie itself.

In the effort to create a Selfie, what happened to it's spontaneity?

October Diaries- Post #7: October Girl

October Girl, could you be more beautiful?
There are stars in your eyes and they are blue as the skies.
They sparkle like diamonds and shine like silver.
October girl, does your strength ever quiver?
Like the remains of the spring, you let the past leave within.
You remind me of the winds that blew,
Free. How freely you flew!
From October to November, to the months that were inevitable
October Girl, did the change of weather change your will?
You will to move from land to land,
You will to thread many a sand.
October Girl, I hate to break your spirit out there,
But it wont be October every where.
Don't let that break your heart, dear child.
This world is treacherous, and maybe wild
But you're made of October and all things nice,
So don't be afraid, dear little girl,
October is half way through,
But it's not the end of the world.

Dear Heart

Dear Heart,
Why must you suffer the pain of my wrong doing?
Others say you deserve to feel this way.
But how can I blame you for feeling the way you do.
A partner doesn't abandon.
I can't live without you and you can't without me.
Together we see through the best and the worst of times.
Dear heart, pain is temporary.
Tomorrow will be a happier day.
Or maybe it will be today.
But suffer no more old friend
For I have grown to understand you.
And you understand me.
Maybe the past helped us grow.
The future will be better.
No more is it me against you.
It's me and you against the world.
Come what may, I'm never leaving your side again.
You and I can conquer and achieve.
And with each other, there can be no one stronger.
O heart of mine, let me be foolish no more.
I've learnt a lesson thats for a lifetime:
Your own heart before any other,
Fall in love within before falling for another.

The Raging Storm

The words won't come when they must.
But for an idle mind, these thoughts, they lust.
They inhabit every corner and side,
Leaving no space for silence to abide.
There's a whirlwind, a form of a storm.
It's raging and you know where it's come from.
But no one should know what's beneath your skin.
No one would care for this Trojan-like betrayal from within.
You want to be free, but be in control,
You wanna see what you want, but won't take what may unfold.
You wanna have your way and walk it too,
But you'll have to have your cake and eat it too.
Your thoughts are spinning wildly in a mess,
You want to pen it down, but you fear you'll digress.
And you search high and low for a place to let go,
For a reason to break and a ground that won't shake,
And you climb the tallest mountains and you sail the deepest seas,
Thinking your happiness lies in places hard to reach.
When all of a sudden life stops you in the middle of no where
And you close your eyes and feel the air.
And you take it in and let the storm out.
You let it fill you with strength and it dissolves the doubt.
You've been everywhere but inside of yourself,
That's where you go now, that's where you delve.
And your strength is back as easy as that,
You just needed to stop the noise, turn the volume down flat.
And you're on your knees and the feeling is gone
You open your eyes....

The storm was you all along.

October Diaries- Post #6: The Other Side

She tip toed her way into a life
And then another and still one more.
And as she went she touched their souls
And gave them reason to live a lot more.
This girl, she thrived on her ability to love.
It drove people to love in turn.
And thus she never stopped this switching game,
Loving all she could was never enough.

One day she came upon this boy.
Ordinary, though, he seemed,
She loved him explicitly and found perfection in him.
For the fist time, she loved unexpectedly.
For the first time, she felt her love was returned
In the right measure that is for sure.
All her life, this was for what she had loved and yearned.

The boy gave her reason to love herself more than to love him.
And that probably did her more good than she'd think, for him, she could.
Until the day, so subtly, he left her alone
And went away for reasons untold.

Suddenly, the girl who went around changing everyone's lives,
Who had made a difference to lives one after the other,
Was experiencing change like it was a new tide.
Now, someone changed her, she stood on the other side.

October Diaries- Post #5: Best of both worlds

She changed the color of her hair
She changed the style of her attire
She got a piercing or maybe two
Then she moved away
She changed her name and her school
Her address was new and so were the people she knew
They asked her why this escapade
She said she had stopped loving herself because one had stopped loving her.
And she contemplated ceasing to live at all.
For what use is living without loving?
One day she realised she could fall in love again
She loves the girl back home.
For as long as that girl is loved by her, there shall be no reason to end this life.

October Diaries- Post #4: Take me by the hand

October skies, don't rain on me,
I've just gotten used to you and your ways.
Don't let a drops of rain fall any more,
Don't let the clouds gang on me any more.
It's alright if it's dull, that will do me some good.
But please don't take me back to the past I never understood.
Skies of hope, skies of mine,
There's a reason you left the past behind.
Move on forth,
Take your time.
But cease the day.
Keep moving, take me to the days of May.
For maybe or maybe not, I'm afraid I might lose my way.
October dear, do guide me there,
Where the sky is mine and mine to command.
Take me now, take me slow, but take me by the hand.

October Diaries- Post #3: Wishing on an autumn leaf

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
If wishes were autumn leaves, every fall would be a dream come true.
For the thousands of leaves that die to make way
For newer lives, for a newer day.
For every leaf that changes color, somewhere somehow a life is changing,
A milestone is being crossed, a leap is being taken, a revolution is being won.
And while life dies and changes form, while energy travels across the universe,
Somewhere, a little boy rakes away the past and hopes for a better future.

October Diaries- Post #2: So long, September...

Dear September,

How funny it is to be able to see how different October is from you. While you gave me everything you could, October is just here and it's surprising me already.

September, I write this not to dis you or to disregard you. No, don't consider this letter to be one of hate. September, you were great.

September, I'm sure your intentions were for the best and I'm sure somewhere it wasn't you who's to blame, but me. But look for yourself, see what October is doing to me.

October, on arrival, already has given me so much to look forward to. This change in company has together brought a change in feeling. Almost like the weather has turned and the atmosphere is healing.

Maybe another universe has taken over.

Years from today, September, you may learn to be more like him. Maybe you should. But for now, for today, maybe for forever, October has won my heart.

Thank you, dear friend for trying though. You prepared me for this change that was inevitable. I should have known October would be here. I guess I lost track of time and forgot what makes a year.

Take Care, September, fix yourself up. Until another year...

Yours Regretfully,

Me

October Diaries- Post #1: Come October

Come October, come and rest.
No weather be more restful, than October at its best.
Come dull skies, come leisurely days.
Come October, come once more to amaze.
Bring your winds and let poets write
Of autumn and fall and of the eerie night.
Bring with you, October, some inspiration for the painter
Give him more colors, please, before the winter.
Come October, bless the souls of all,
Bless this season of leisure, bless this season of fall.